It’s Time For A Reckoning

How to design your own empowerment regimen, and an invitation to participate with me.

Tuesday marks the first day of a month-long self empowerment regimen. I am looking to center, ground, and feel better. Care to journey with me? We can be accountability buddies and still do our own individual regimens. This blog describes my process of reckoning; in order to design the right regimen there has to first be a reckoning with where/who you are now. Reminder: honest self review is essential but always utilize compassion and a sense of humor while doing your assessment.

Utilizing the four categories, as I so oft do, for balanced assessment; home, body, relationships, career. Years ago I learned the biblical Hebrew word that eventually translated into “sin” is the same word used in archery when one misses the bullseye. I immediately attached to that notion for Yom Kippur, and now any, self reckoning. So we begin with free writing by category and ask, “Where have I missed the mark?” Identifying this is what leads to building an active regimen tuned in to true needs. And if analyzing the missed mark is too weighty? It’s ok. Stay light. Look forward asking, “what will make x category feel better?”

Journal with constant recognition of who you are now today and what life looks like now today, so you can release what doesn’t serve you today, it did its time and if it’s needed again later it can return. I am a stay-at-home mom of an 8.5 month-old living thru pandemic times with my partner working from home. I do not have much *nearly any* time for or by myself daily, in fact I type this blog on my cellphone while holding a napping baby. There’s a whole lot of new that is my world now and I’m holding on to a lot of old in the tangible and intangibles. This month’s process is sure to shake it all up, whenever one embraces these kinds of regimens the opportunity for clarity and change is tumultuous so I ask that my lessons be gentle with me and I work to deep breathe and be like a surfer riding waves with some distanced perspective of their movement. This is all about better and forward, ultimately. My goals include being physically strong and vibrantly healthy, more confident that I’m treating myself well, and enjoying creative opportunity that empowers quality of life with my family.

Below is what this first part of the process looks like. In order: reflection, real talk, realistic actions. I also write stretch goals because my tendency is to want to go that far right away but it’s a recipe for failure, I write them so I can honor my instinct and the possibility of more. However, this is the beginning of a journey that can *and will* happen again.

So here’s my journal word vomit. Feel free to skim so you get the idea of what to do for yourself. It’s messy. Stream of consciousness. Consolidated for readership’s survival. Honest. Written without judgement. I’m staying real, the demands need be reasonable to my busy life, progress not perfection. Here we go!

Home: Stuff. I have stuff that doesn’t serve me. Yes, I’m postpartum and don’t know my size/shape and it’s still changing and as an actor *if the industry returns* I need different audition looks, and maybe I’ll be pregnant again some day so this body remains in flux and and and *excuses*…. regardless of the flux, I know who I am and know I don’t need all I have. Time to feel my authentic self in anything I wear, and all I own, I release what I no longer am as I release items, making my space relevant/supportive/empowering for me as I am now, providing me more peace and less chores and mental clutter. Action: I release one item every day.  I love my local Buy Nothing Group (search Buy Nothing on Facebook + your neighborhood name to find yours) it is a wonderful way to minimize waste and contribute something positive to your neighbors life easily. I will post an item a day and give to whomever in that group requests it. Stretch goals: cleaning my garage, swapping closets with my hubs, and giving away more than one item any given day. *Realized after I finished this chunk that my cat with behavioral issues of peeing on my floor has been driving me crazy, obviously that needs addressing too! Action: take her to vet and rearrange furniture.

Body: This category pushed me to make this regimen invocation happen and will be a large part of my activity shift. I can immediately name changes needed and commitments for the regimen because it’s so clear to me where I’m not doing what is best for my health. I had my baby early December and postpartum with holidays and an unanticipated cesarean birth made my body recovery different too… then that rolled into quarantine and my husband grocery shopping once every 3 weeks and me losing food and produce control I used to have and… here we are. Also, late diagnosis celiac has me still repairing my gut. My body goal is for feeling clean, strength and vigor. Action: increase hydration, minimum 5 large glasses – ideal 8 large glasses- a day, including downing a whole one first thing, before coffee. Alcohol is minimal in my life right now but I’ll just go ahead and say none for the month. No sugar added Monday-Thursday, exception for flavored cream in coffee, mama’s crutch she can’t release. One day a week all liquid, soup with stuff in it ok. I bought a protein and greens powder for weekday breakfast smoothie and a protein collagen peptide powder to add to my coffee. Increase my stretching and muscle building and start pelvic floor therapy. I have a prescription for pelvic floor therapy and need to start. I recently found a super productive method of flexible workout commitment and I’m bringing it back! A checklist in phone notes of stretches and exercises I love and are helpful, copy paste the checklist daily. The reason this works is because I don’t expect to do everything every day, I just do what I can in between taking care of my kid and by the end of day I’ve done some body care! Stretch goals: increase vegetable intake, go for a stroller jog if heat allows, 25 minute morning workout video if baby allows.

Career: oooh interesting one as this is a super dramatic life change area and it’s time to look at this question with fresh eyes. Yes I’m now a stay at home mom, still learning this is a career in and of itself, and I’m building an alternative career with writing children’s books. Action: remain thoughtful in care and development of my baby, providing physically and intellectually engaging activity in all her days and lots of fun and music and cuddles. Use time apart from baby (naps) to write, or when final draft of my project is done, move it forward to representation and/or publishing – every day some individual creative progress. Stretch goals: start all-encompassing website for myself and my kid, record vocal track of original song and engage with music producer to get a finished track, start nextchildren’s book.

Relationships: Self is priority now; spiritual, mental, personal, societal. I trust that my feeding this will lead to richer relationships of those around me too. You cannot give what you don’t have. The creative career action is also my relationship mind work. Action: Sharing this process with y’all will also strengthen my connection to self so I will do public and private daily journaling of this commitment. I will pull tarot cards ever weekend. First day of this regimen launch and full moon, Sept 1st, I will sage and grid my house. Social media has increased my anxiety, it tricks my mind into thinking I’ve effectively engaged when I’ve passively engaged and often I’ve shared an inflammatory truth that’s oil on a fire and accomplishes nothing good. I will minimize social media engagement, maintaining specifically for communication of this endeavor and sharing baby joys. By always asking if my actions are helping, I will replace the political posting that is a release valve that spreads my toxic air, like the unmasked among us, with active, supportive, productive societal engagement. Stretch goals: regular phone calls to friends, crystal layout and cleansing of stones.

Your turn now. Try to enjoy your process with this. I took days to write this up and it already challenged me with frustration at the current state of my affairs. I didn’t like looking in all the areas that need addressing and I occasionally feel overwhelmed. Don’t shut down. Push thru gently. Compassion and a sense of humor, remember? Love yourself, you are doing good work and whatever needs changing can be loved for the mess it’s in and the fact you are now ready to make it different. I believe in you. I believe in me too, we got this.

I’ve been doing this for ages so the flow is pretty natural but please know this looks different every time, and it 100% should because everything is in a cycle of change constantly and so your guideposts move. Years ago when I had no job and lost my fiancé and our life together I did a regimen to counter depression that included 15 minutes sun sitting every day, 20 minutes cardio, showering daily, singing, wearing clean clothes, writing about what I wanted my new home to look like etc. Make your regimen your own, keep it honest, and let me know if you need help designing or what actions you decide to do. I’m excited to take this journey with you. Hard good work is always better with loving accountability company.

To summarize my regimen from full moon to full moon starting September 1st:

*this consolidated version will be added to my notepad on phone so I can use it daily, I have also previously written it out and tapped to mirror. As always, do what works.*

  • Getting rid/giving away of an item a day
  • Taking cat to vet
  • Rearranging furniture
  • Minimum 5, ideally 8 glasses of water a day (my glass is 12oz)
  • No alcohol
  • No sugar added Monday-Thursday *coffee creamer exempt
  • One day a week all liquid/soup *Tuesday
  • Morning protein/greens powder
  • Weekend collagen/protein powder
  • Start pelvic floor therapy
  • Do something daily of stretch and muscle tone checklist
  • Engage my child with fun and intellectually/physically stimulating play
  • Recognize the importance of the work I do for and with her
  • Make daily progress with creative fulfillment via writing or getting writing published
  • Journal this process daily for myself and those of you traveling it with me
  • Minimize social media engagement except for the sharing and supporting of this work
  • Once a week tarot
  • Full moon sage and grid house
  • Frequently ask and answer if my actions are helpful before taking them

Woohoo!! And away we go!! Comment here, on Facebook or Insta throughout this journey.


** And yes I encountered blog formatting issues today but this blog was brought to you anyway by… PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION xoxo


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