A year ago my health trouble escalated. For the last six months it has been nearly every two weeks that I am knocked down again for one reason or another. You know a great way to kill your social life? Get sick. Get sick a lot.
It is worth noting that prior to this time I saw doctors infrequently and have taken my strength and fitness as a source of pride. Tomorrow I will start a journey with a new and even more heightened body commitment. Before we launch into that phase of healing we must know the sicknesses.
One of my favorite healer teachers, she told me that when people come to see you they are thick in the mud of life. She said, you cannot just shine a light above and ask them to come to you, that will only harden the mud around them. It is your job to get in the mud and hold it away from their body just enough for them to breathe and feel your love, then there is room for their healing. This is the work I strive always to do. So, let us get in the mud a bit.
I am grateful to western medicine for the discoveries in diagnosis of what ails me, I am not so keen on their treatments of lifetime medication prescriptions and intense procedures with low success rates compared to alternative methods which are also far less intrusive. However, diagnosis reveals treatments offered by alternative medicine that I could not know so well without certainty of what lies beneath my skin.
My body issues screamed loudly enough for me to go to an allergist. She asked why I came to her. My body had become sensitive, I could not tell to what, except maybe everything. Sometimes I had a rash by my neck, sometimes my stomach was upset, sometimes it was stagnant. Calling my body sensitive in all realms was the easiest way to tell it. She tested me on skin contact issues and food issues and kicked-off valuable and life-changing learning.
Diagnoses of this past year: Whiplash of cervical spine, allergy to steroids, rare bacterial infection #1, allergies to gold/nickel/lanolin, removal of birth control implant due to complications, celiac disease, rare bacterial infection #2, switching of birth control pill due to complications, bulging of discs L4 and L5 and nerve impingement.
To list the symptoms I suffered is too long and too dull. Someone asked how I was doing at one point this year and I said that if I could return this year I would but then again I’m sure that I’d be missing out on some damn important wisdom that I suppose I’m stronger with so….
Here’s the wisdom. The time has come for me to live in the responsibility of my vessel. Owning my wellness is aligned with the true wants of my warrior self and so I’m excited. I’m terrified too, scared to miss out and scared to stand in my power in equal parts.
It is time for me to heal my gut as I recover from the damage done as a celiac. For those who don’t know, having celiac means I cannot have gluten. Celiac is to blame for hurting my immune system, and likely why my allergy issues and bacterial infections were prominent. In removing gluten from my diet I can also heal my immune system perhaps even rid myself of allergies previously diagnosed.
Post-diagnosis I gained more than ten pounds in one month and nearly twenty pounds in the three months. This has been especially hard to live with because it happened while I have been dedicatedly tending my diet and exercise. All my friends who quit gluten lost weight so I expected the same result, but those friends do not have celiac and had not been damaging their systems as I have. My body is just learning to process food, it spent most of my life just passing through. I was told to have patience and be kind to myself as my body figures out how to digest nutrients.
“The body wants to heal.”
That’s what my doctor said as he told me about my bulging discs in my lower back that won’t heal. That’s comedy. It’s also motivation, because if I can’t heal the discs I can still heal things around that area that contribute to pain. I can strengthen the muscles that support that area, and I can treat inflammation with regularity when doing anything strenuous.
Recently I became immobilized by a poorly educated masseuse who did deep tissue and aggravated my lower back so everything became inflamed and went in spasm, it totally knocked me down. I’m in recovery for the last two weeks and still sore around the entirety of my hips, but I do have less pain and more mobility daily. My doctor recommended patience, and slow work toward improvement.
My body has been screaming for constancy in its tending, now I am listening. What is your body telling you? I will be shaping the tools of healing around my unique needs, I’m sure that some will be of value to you. I also encourage time away from teachings, simply listening to your intuition and to your body needs and response.
Healthful living takes proper preparation, so I’m off to the market, ready to set myself up for success. Letting my doctors words resound as motivating mantra.
“The body wants to heal.”